Every man is unique. Yet, somehow, after a while, you start noticing… categories.
1. The Romantic
He arrives with flowers, compliments your eyes, and looks at you, like you’re the heroine of a French movie. Three hours later he’s explaining, that he has “never felt this kind of connection before.” Sir, we met 45 minutes ago.
He arrives with flowers, compliments your eyes, and looks at you, like you’re the heroine of a French movie. Three hours later he’s explaining, that he has “never felt this kind of connection before.” Sir, we met 45 minutes ago.
2. The Philosopher
He doesn’t want to “just have a good time.” He wants to discuss existence, consciousness, love, death, and whether humans are fundamentally good. At 2 a.m., you’re somehow debating Nietzsche in lingerie.
He doesn’t want to “just have a good time.” He wants to discuss existence, consciousness, love, death, and whether humans are fundamentally good. At 2 a.m., you’re somehow debating Nietzsche in lingerie.
3. The Silent One
Minimal words. Maximum mystery.
Minimal words. Maximum mystery.
You ask, “How was your day?”
“Good.”
“Do you like travelling?”
“Yes.”
“Anything you’d like to talk about?”
“No.”
Honestly, at this point you’re considering charging him by the syllable.
“Good.”
“Do you like travelling?”
“Yes.”
“Anything you’d like to talk about?”
“No.”
Honestly, at this point you’re considering charging him by the syllable.
4. “I’m Not Like Other Men”
He announces this within the first ten minutes. He doesn’t like clubs. He doesn’t watch football. He doesn’t use dating apps. He’s “very different.” You nod politely while thinking: Interesting. I have heard this exact speech approximately 73 times.
He announces this within the first ten minutes. He doesn’t like clubs. He doesn’t watch football. He doesn’t use dating apps. He’s “very different.” You nod politely while thinking: Interesting. I have heard this exact speech approximately 73 times.
5. The Suddenly-A-Psychologist
You came expecting dinner and conversation. Instead, he looks deeply into your eyes and says:
“You know, what your problem is?” Congratulations. Your appointment with Dr. Stranger has begun.
You came expecting dinner and conversation. Instead, he looks deeply into your eyes and says:
“You know, what your problem is?” Congratulations. Your appointment with Dr. Stranger has begun.
6. The Interviewer
He has so many questions. Where are you from? What are your plans? What do you want from life? What are your five-year goals? At some point you wonder, if you accidentally applied for a corporate position.
He has so many questions. Where are you from? What are your plans? What do you want from life? What are your five-year goals? At some point you wonder, if you accidentally applied for a corporate position.
7. The CEO
Everything is “business.” His company, his investments, his watches, his private jet, his three houses… You know more about his portfolio, than about his personality.
Everything is “business.” His company, his investments, his watches, his private jet, his three houses… You know more about his portfolio, than about his personality.
8. The Boyfriend Experience Enthusiast
He wants everything to feel “natural.” Breakfast. Coffee. Cuddles. Inside jokes. Basically, he wants a girlfriend — but with customer support and flexible booking hours.
He wants everything to feel “natural.” Breakfast. Coffee. Cuddles. Inside jokes. Basically, he wants a girlfriend — but with customer support and flexible booking hours.
9. The Oversharer
You know his childhood trauma before you know his last name. By dessert, you’ve heard about his divorce, his mother, his ex-wife, his therapist, and the family dog.
You know his childhood trauma before you know his last name. By dessert, you’ve heard about his divorce, his mother, his ex-wife, his therapist, and the family dog.
10. The “Just One Drink” Guy
“This will be quick. Just one drink.” Three hours later, you’re discussing childhood memories, ordering another bottle, and somehow planning a trip to Italy.
“This will be quick. Just one drink.” Three hours later, you’re discussing childhood memories, ordering another bottle, and somehow planning a trip to Italy.
And then there is… 11. The Normal Guy
He’s polite. He communicates clearly. He respects boundaries. He doesn’t try to psychoanalyse you, marry you, hire you, save you, or explain quantum physics over dinner. He simply says:
“Would you like another glass of wine?” And suddenly… he’s the most exotic species of them all.
He’s polite. He communicates clearly. He respects boundaries. He doesn’t try to psychoanalyse you, marry you, hire you, save you, or explain quantum physics over dinner. He simply says:
“Would you like another glass of wine?” And suddenly… he’s the most exotic species of them all.